Remote key fob - replacement

500 caterhams p/a IIRC. And there's loads of LTIs around.

 

Bwhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. You fuckwit. The 300C was
slagged here for being possibly the worst handling car even imported
into Britain. And the interior is regarded as below the quality achieved
by East European car makers.

The ones with rear suspension copied from a Roman horse-drawn cart you
mean?

One of the least reliable vehicles in the world, equally useless both on
road and off it. Owners swear at it, not by it.

One of the few 4x4s that's even worse than the Cherokee.

<wipes tears of mirth from eyes>

Sorry, what colour is the sky on your planet?

Oh priceless.

 

Chrysler, owned by Germans and still making crap cars. That has to be
some sort of record.

 

Steve Firth (%steve%@malloc.co.uk) gurgled happily, sounding much like
they were saying :

TBF, if he was referring to the ML, it wouldn't be difficult.

Still, I'm sure the technology exchange between Merc and Chrysler is more
than just a one-way thing. They're comparing notes on building crap cars.

Thinking back, my parents rented a Chrysler of some kind in the mid-80s in
California. 30 miles or something on the clock when we picked it up. In a
week it set fire to the brakes when shown a road anything other than dead
straight, and one rear window fell off the regulator and disappeared into
the bowels of the door.

 

The Lincoln LS doesn't have much in common with an S-type other than the
cramped cabin arrangement. Something that seems common in American cars.
I can't understand why a nation of lard-arses trys to shoehorn
themselves into such small car interiors (with such large exteriors).

The dynamics of the Lincoln are laughable. Now I know why rock and roll
is the national music.

 

Untrue, the Monaro is the Pontiac Goat, for example.

 

Not quite, some are rebadged Isuzus, some are rebadged Holdens, and some
Opels are rebadged Lotuses.

The vauxhalls on sale today arent' much cop, bland, boring GM products
designed by teams of accountants.

They built the cars their American bosses told them to build. They
didn't sell well in Europe in consequence.

 

Umm hmm, you make my point so eloquently.

 

TBH I don't see that the "cheaper" is relevant. Just because someone
suggests that I eat horse shit at 25p/Kg rather than steak at £8/Kg
doesn't make horse shit a bargain. And it's very difficult to find a
Euro car that matches the Neon, there's not much that slow, that badly
built or with such crap handling and mpg. It's almost in a class of its
own.

So (with some difficulty) cheaper and better built/specced:

Citroen Xsara 1.6, sadly for the Neon the Xsara is more roomy, has
better fitted interior and does 41mpg.

Fiat Doblo, as ugly as a Neon, much roomier, handles better than the
Neon, costs £2000 less than a Neon and does 50mpg. It's a converted van,
but WTF, it still knocks spots off the Neon.

Fiat Multipla 1.6, even uglier than the Neon, but the interior is
stunning, seats six in comfort, same price as the Neon, same speed but
way ahead in terms of safety, size and interior style. Top Gear magazine
regularly features letters from Septics begging to be allowed to buy a
Multipla.

Ford Focus Zetec 2.0i, outclasses the Neon in every department, same
price as the Neon.

Hyundai Elantra, identical in every respect to the Neon, ugly, slow,
badly built, handles like a jelly on a shovel. But it's £3,000 cheaper
than the Neon.

Kia Magentis 2.0 LE, outperforms the Neon, has better handling, interior
space, costs £3,000 less than the Neon.

Mazda 3, it's a Mazda so far better built than any Chrysler. Handling is
as good as the Focus and it costs less than the Neon for the same
performance or only £1.5k more for much better performance.

Mercedes A140 Classic, it's smaller outside than the Neon, but much,
much bigger inside especially for the passengers. Slightly slower,
handling isn't as good as most European cars but still way better than
the Neon.

MG ZR, I hate MG/Rover and all their products but for less money than a
Neon they will sell you a car that does 0-60 in 8.6 seconds and that
manages 54 mpg. Suck on that Chrysler.

Mini Cooper, slightly cheaper than the Neon 0-60 in 9.1s, 44 mpg,
doesn't depreciate significantly. If you want the same performance as
the Neon you can get the Mini One and save yourself £3,000.

Mitsubishi Carisma, as dull as the Neon but much better built. Slightly
slower 0-60 (11.9s) but does 52mpg. Bigger inside than the Neon. £2,000
cheaper than the Neon.

Nissan Almera, dull in a different way to the Neon, ugly like the Neon
but much more practical as a shopping trolley. If you get one as slow as
a Neon you'll save yourself close to £3,000.

Nissan Primera, bigger than the Neon but with a much, much better
chassis. The most basic Primera costs just a few hundred more than the
Neon but the car is way above the Neon's league.

Peugeot 307, same price and same speed as the Neon but 54 mpg.

Proton GEN-2, identical in almost every respect to the Neon, but £3,000
cheaper.

Rover 45, dated, soon to be replaced so it's like the Neon, only better
and £1,000 cheaper.

Seat Leon, for a generation it's the car to have, cheaper than the Neon,
better looking, and built by a VW subsidiary so it's rock solid. If you
pay £2,000 more than the price of the Neon LX, you can get a Leon 1.8
20V T Cupra, which blows the Neon away (0-60 in 7.7s).

Skoda Octavia 1.8T vRS, costs the same as the Neon and it's a stretched
version of a VW Golf floorpan with a 1.8 Turbo engine. 0-60 in 7.9s, top
speed 150 mph. The only time an Octavia driver will see a Neon driver is
as a spot in the rear window getting rapidly smaller and smaller.

Smart Forfour, £2,000 cheaper than the Neon, smaller outside but bigger
inside with "lounge chair" layout giving acres of room to passengers.
Not as sassy as the original Smart Fortwo but it blows the Neon away in
terms of dynamics, looks and comfort.

Suzuki Liana, pretty similar to the Neon, but £3,000 to £4,000 cheaper.
Just about every star on the face of the planet has driven one,
including Lionel Ritchie, Jodie Kidd and JK of Jamiroquai

Toyota Corolla 1.6 VVTi, stonking engine, and it's a Toyota, puts the
Neon to shame, costs £100 less.

Yes of course it would be a good idea to forget that the USonians are
trying to sell dangerous heaps of junk over here. Did y'all stick yer
fingers in yuh ears when that lefty pinko liberal Nader spoke?

 

%steve%@malloc.co.uk (Steve Firth) gurgled happily, sounding much like they
were saying:

Whereas in the past...?

 

Were commented on in the bit you snipped.

 

Other way around.

 

Yes, well you would say that.

AFAIK, it's based on a European Omega platform.

 

Hmm, no you're wrong.

The Monaro is based on the Opel Omega and the Pontiac GTO is a badge
engineered Holden. Because you septics can't design a decent suspension
to save your lives.

 

Check your facts, old bean. We get none of the above in North America.
Saabs that use the same platform don't count.

 

ooOOOOOooooh! Five hundred whole cars! Pfft.

 

Steve, you ignorant slut:

The Monaro is an Australian Holden design. It was rebadged into the
Pontiac GTO for (very limited) sale in North America. Not the other way
round.

 

Erm, you really are a bit dense, aren't you:

The Saturn Ion, Chevrolet Cobolt and Vx/Opel Astra are all on the same
platform.

There was also a Chevrolet Cavalier (amongst other GM brands) that
shared it's platform with the European Cavalier / Ascona (MkII Cavalier)

The Chevrolet Malibu, Pontiac G6 and Vx/Opel Vectra all share the same
platform.

The Vx/Opel Corsa is going to become a replacement for the Chevrolet
Aveo.

Finally, there's definitely versions of the Omega over there - the
Pontiac GTO being one.

 

Perhaps you'd care to tell us where Holden got the platform and who
first used it.

As a clue, it was a large RWD saloon built in Germany.

 

Apparently on date Sat, 12 Feb 2005 19:17:09 -0500, "Daniel J. Stern"

Well, take any fifty chryslers on a european track (or length of road that
isn't pretty much a straight line or Indy oval) and put them up against any two
caterhams, and see if you can guess which cars come first and second.